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How could our Head Teacher have guessed the true intentions of those five famous mathematicians - who turn up at the beginning of this assembly, totally unannounced? Read on to find out!
Duration: 10 – 15 minutes
As with cast size, the performance may be longer or shorter than time specified – this time is a rough approximation and based on reading time alone i.e. not inclusive of music/singing/dance routines. For a longer performance, additional information could be added on e.g. inclusion of more mathematical facts, problems etc.
Cast of 30 - easily adaptable up or down:
1. Narrator/Head Teacher
7. Reception Maths Teacher: Miss Plus
8. Year 1 Maths Teacher: Mr. Minus
9. Year 2 Maths Teacher: Miss Times
10. Year 3 Maths Teacher: Miss Sphere
11. Year 4 Maths Teacher: Mr. Pyramid
12. Year 5 Maths Teacher: Miss Query
13. Year 6 Maths Teacher: Mr. Solution
14. Yr. 3 Child 1
15. Yr. 5 Child 1
16. Yr. 5 Child 2
17. Yr. 5 Child 3
18. Yr. 5 Child 4
19. Yr. 6 Child 1
20. Yr. 6 Child 2
21. Students – this remaining number can be divided into different Year Groups (Reception, Year 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6)
(All Key Stage Two teachers and students stand up)
Miss Sphere: (To Year 3 children). So, who can name five two-dimensional shapes?
Yr 3 Child 1: I can, miss! A circle, a triangle, a square, a rectangle, a hexagon, an octagon, ..
Miss Sphere: (Interrupting) Yes, yes! Just the five will do, thank you!
Mr. Pyramid: (To Year 4 children) And my children! Who can name five three D shapes?
Yr 4 Child 1: I can, sir! A sphere, a cube, a cuboid, a cone, a square-based pyramid, a triangular-based pyramid, a ….
Mr. Pyramid: (Interrupting) Yes, yes! Enough! Thank you!
Narrator: Seems to me your children could do with a little counting revision! Next!
Miss Query: (Scowling at Year 5s) And so to ..
Year 5s: (Together, groaning) Problems!
Mr. Solution: (Laughing) Oh come on guys! Problems aren’t that bad, are they? I mean, I’ve never had a problem solving one!
Narrator: And that wouldn’t have anything to do with your name, Mr. Solution, would it?
Mr. Solution: Of course not! Anyone can do problems!
Yr. 6 Child 2: So why are they called ‘problems’ then, sir?
Miss Query: Good question! (Sighing) I wish I knew the answer to that one!
(Descartes stands up)
Descartes: (Coughing) Um, pardon me. I don’t mean to interrupt but I just thought … (pauses) … well, maybe that’s the answer!
Miss Query: Pardon?
Descartes: Well, it’s all about thinking! Not just chanting ….(turns to Key Stage one ‘counters’) though of course there is nothing wrong with that, as long as you understand what you are chanting!
Mr. Solution: I’m not sure I understand exactly what you are saying. I mean, we do encourage our students to think.
Descartes: But maybe it’s the way they think that you have to address. I mean, do they look like they enjoy problem solving?
Miss Query: Oh I can assure you we have the greatest fun working out things like… (pauses) now let me see … OK, here goes! If I get to the train station half an hour early, and my train, which is supposed to arrive at 3.30pm, doesn’t actually arrive til 4.15pm, how long has the journey taken before I actually get anywhere?
(Year 5s and 6s clasp their heads in their hands, before Yr. 5 Child 1 speaks up)
Yr 5 Child 1: That depends how long it took you to get to the station, miss!
Miss Query: (Groaning) Oh very well, if you must make it more complicated. Say, 10 minutes.
(Five second silence, interrupted by Yr. 5 Child 2)
Yr 5 Child 2: Er ..
Miss Query: (Excitedly) Yes! Speak up!
Yr. 5 Child 2: Er, could you repeat the question please, Miss?
Miss Query: (Exploding) Oh really! What is the matter with you all? What could be simpler than working out the difference between 3 pm and 4.15pm? – oh (looking at Yr. 5 Child 1) and not forgetting to add on that 10 minutes.
Yr 5 Child 3: That’s one hour and 15, no, I mean 25 minutes, Miss!
Miss Query: (Irritably) Better late than never!
Yr 5 Child 4: Bit like the train, Miss!