Olympic Games 2016 Leavers Assembly
A challenging one for this school’s head teacher! It’s never going to be easy working with an English teacher (Mrs Wright) who’s always right; a Maths teacher (Mr Minus) who’s always negative; a Geography teacher (Miss Place) who is always getting lost; a History teacher (Mr Date) who is always late; and as for that Music teacher (Ms Tune) – maybe somebody could ask her to stop singing? …. Or at least do it in tune?!
And then there’s Mr Fit (P.E. teacher) who isn’t quite as tough as he looks. With insults flying, who is going to stop the staff from stealing the show?
Just as well those Year sixes are up to the task!
Written for cast of 30 but easily adjustable up (2 to 3 classes) or down – see production notes –the duration is likewise extremely flexible, depending on amount of music used – there are over 20 pieces of music to choose from. As a rough guide, the reading time is approximately 15 minutes but this does not include ‘mini presentations’ of different sports.
Script also includes Olympic Ode – performed by the children.
Head Teacher: Wow! What an amazing set of Olympians!
Mr Fit: All potential medal holders!
Mr Minus: (Scowling) All right for some!
Head Teacher: What do you mean, Mr Minus, all right for some?
Mr Minus: Well, whilst I’m indoors, slaving away over long division, he (pointing to Mr Fit) is out there in the sunshine, knocking a few balls around and … well, generally having a ball!
Mrs Wright: (Bitterly) Yeah! All right for some! Whilst I’m writing away, inside, filling in all that missing punctuation, he’s out there playing games!
Miss Place: Whilst I’m finding different places on a map!
Mr Date: And I’m battling it out with the Tudors!
Ms Tune: And me? I’m busy filling the school with (breaks into song) “The Sound of Music”!
Mr Fit: (Taking up aggressive pose) So what are you all saying? That it’s easier teaching P.E. than it is teaching Maths, English, Geography, History and Music?
Mr Minus: That’s about the sum of it!
Mr Fit: So, you’re saying these Olympians got this far (pauses) through what? Sheer luck?
Mrs Wright: Oh come on, Mr Fit! It’s a clear case of brawn over brain, if you don’t mind me saying!
Mr Fit: (Exploding) What?
Mrs Wright: Well. How hard can it be (walking over to Child 1 – 5): to launch an arrow, run a mile, hit a shuttlecock, throw a ball and leap around a beach?
Mr Minus: Yeah. How hard can it be (walking over to Child 6 – 10): to throw a punch, row a boat, steer a bike, ride a horse and hold a sword?
Miss Place: Yeah. How hard can it be (walking over to Child 11 – 15): to kick a ball, keep a balance, chuck a ball, strike a ball and ground an opponent?
Mr Date: Yeah. How hard can it be (walking over to Child 16 – 20): to take part in lots of different events, race a boat, stay on target, smash a ball and make a few kicks?
Ms Tune: Yeah. How hard can it be (walking over to Child 21 – 23): to swim a few lengths, lift a few weights, get your opponent on the ground?
(All contestants shaking their head in disbelief)
Mr Fit: (Addressing contestants) Can you believe what you’ve just heard? Do they (pointing at other teachers) seriously think they’d last five minutes in one of our training sessions? I’d like to see them try!